7 Effective Tips to Help Save Marriages

Statistics have shown that almost 60% of all marriages end in divorce. With these high statistics most married couples look for a way to make sure they do not fall victim and become just another statistic. Unfortunately some marriages cannot be saved but surprisingly, most can. However it does require a commitment and effort from both parties to help save the marriage relationship. It does not really matter at the end of the day which person was at fault, or what the problem was, but that the two persons in the relationship solve it and can move forward. So how do they do it? What do they need to do to rebuild their relationship and make it better than ever? Below are listed 7 effective tips to help save marriage relationships that are easy to follow. Important tip: Both husband and wife has to be willing to put these into action in order to have the best possible effect on their relationship.

1. Communication - this one skill is crucial to good relationships and in a marriage relationship especially so. The closer we are in our relationships the more important good communication skills are. This is where both of you must be open and honest with each other, and be willing to share your thoughts, feelings, opinions, what you want and need with each other. By bringing out in the open and helping your partner understand you and what some of the issues are, you can both work on resolving those issues.

2. Calm conversations - when you have issues that you need to discuss and work through, it will help you to stay calm and look at the issues rationally. By keeping calm and not getting personal or defensive you will be able to resolve your issues in calm and respectful manner. Be open to listening to your partner and focus on locating the cause and the solution that benefits both of you.

3. Compromise - there is always a little give and take in a marriage and being willing to compromise and find a solution that both of you can live with goes a long way to building a happy marriage relationship. There will always be differences and it is about respecting those differences in each other and living with them in a manageable way.

4. Common and personal goal-setting - every person needs goals and having some goals that the two of you have together will help you both focus and move in the same direction. Having goals together and making plans towards those goals will help build and strengthen the bonds between you.

5. Acceptance and tolerance - working on issues can take time and you need to allow your spouse time to work through their thoughts and feelings as well as doing the same yourself. You cannot rush dealing with emotional issues and taking your time will help resolve these issues in a more effective way; rushing can only inflame things and make them worse.

6. Let bygones be bygones - any time there are hurts or offence, forgiveness is necessary in order to move on and grow through the experience. Unfortunately, if a spouse has been unfaithful there may be a lot of hurt to forgive and there also needs to be an admittance of wrong-doing. If the unfaithful partner has no regrets then they are more likely to do it again and they are not giving their partner a base to forgive. However, if the straying spouse can own up to doing the wrong thing and is sincere in regretting hurting their partner and both parties wish to reconcile, then they can do it. It will take forgiving each other, because one person does not seek out other relationships if they feel their needs are met by their spouse. There will have been underlying reasons for the departure from the marriage that caused them to look elsewhere for what they needed. It also takes a significant amount of time to rebuild trust between them and an active commitment to doing this from both spouses. Forgiving each other means getting past those indiscretions and errors in choice, growing through them, forgetting about them and moving forward together.

7. Seek professional help - never be afraid to admit that you may not have all the skills you need to resolve your issues on your own. Finding a professional couples counselor can not only give each of you the encouragement, guidance and support you need but also help you learn new communication skills and give you both tools to work on your issues in a constructive and healthy way. They can give you a different perspective on your issues and they may be all you need to get back on track. If you decide to get help it is important that you both want to do it and that you both feel comfortable with the counselor in order for it to be effective. By working on yourself and your relationship together with your spouse, you can use these tips to help save marriages to begin to make some positive progress toward the marriage you both dream of and make it better than ever. Begin by taking a positive step toward saving your marriage and rebuild the love you once shared.